I just feel so lost

I started a couple of weeks ago doing the pre-season tasks and I was so motivated.  I even started a blog!  But again, the excuses have taken over.  I haven’t done the last two pre-season tasks and I haven’t done any exercise in nearly 2 weeks and although I have tried to cut out alcohol during the week, I had a function last night and sure enough, I had 2 glasses of wine.  I have done this program before and loved it, so why the hell do I just step over my workout clothes in the morning?  I even sit in bed at night reading Mish’s book - losing the last 5 kgs and agree with everything she says.  This is exactly what happened last round.  I started in blaze of glory and then after 2 months it all fell apart.  I don’t know why I seem to have a mental barrier stopping me from achieving my goals.  I just feel CRAP!